First, fancy new train cars, now, silencio! The pilot program for quiet cars on Metro-North trains has proven so popular that it'll be rolled out to all lines. According to the Post, "The railroad says the last car on all morning trains and the first car on all evening trains will be designated as quiet cars. That means cellphones, music players and other electronic devices will be prohibited unless they can be operated quietly. Headphones will have to be at a volume that cannot be heard by others. Conversation must be subdued."
Naughty noisemakers will be given "Shhh" cards. If only the program could be rolled out to every single train car, so the educated can stew in their own intelligence:
