A less scary 4th Avenue is on its way to Bay Ridge, with plans that include cutting traffic to just one lane in each direction and implementing a pedestrian island, among other amenities designed to piss off motorists prevent accidents.
Proposed renderings from the DOT depict a veritable pedestrian paradise, enabling residents to better stroll, caper and gambol down the stretch from between Ovington Avenue and 84th Street with the carefree vigor of off-leash puppies.
The new street designs, created at the behest of residents terrified of getting pulverized by the road's notoriously speedy drivers, includes a left turn bay at 75th Street, a concrete pedestrian island on 86th Street and various parking stripes and high visibility crosswalks intended to more clearly demarcate where people may be standing or walking.
Obviously not everyone is happy with the DOT's suggested changes. According to the Brooklyn Paper, the proposal also includes eliminating "an unspecified number of parking spots," words that cause the majority of Brooklyn drivers to shriek and writhe like vampires/slugs hit by sunshine/salt.
Community Board 10's Allen Bortnick particularly loathes the proposal, telling the Paper that it is just the latest offensive in Department of Transportation commissioner Janette Sadik-Khan's War on Cars. “Sadik-Khan is really Sadist-Khan, and she never met a car she liked,” said Bortnick. We're guessing the parents of the teenager struck on 4th Avenue last month would beg to differ.
