McCarren Park: Where dominatrixes take their slaves for recreation, where ladies in bikinis and drunken Polish men proudly sunbathe, and where "hipsters" funnel their parents' hard-earned money into the multi-billion dollar Turkey's Nest empire. Also: where women strip naked and start throwing punches during softball practice. Yes, over Memorial Day weekend, members of the Williamsburg softball league got quite an eyeful from a woman described on their website as a "crazy bitch" or, "CB" for short:
Scott says to her calmly: “be careful, we’re doing batting practice here.” CB kinda stops then makes her way over to Scott whose on the mound. Then she says to Scott “wow, you’re muscly, are you a boxer?” And Scott (who is indeed muslcy) just kinda stood there and told her to watch out so as to not get hit by a ball… at which point CB does some kind of stutter step Sugar Ray Leonard shit and PUNCHES Scott right in the kisser!
Anyway, to make a long story short, CB ends up leaving the field and walks all the way over to the baseball field, and... scored a hoola-hoop, got naked and began praying to the God of Hipsters in the center of it... As you can see, it was quite emotional and we hope the Gods of Turkey’s Nest came down and blessed her with a Big Bud.
Yes, we know what you're thinking: Why couldn't she have punched a kickball player? But let's not let this sad incident distract us from what's really important, beloved Gothamist commenters: Is McCarren Park in Williamsburg or Greenpoint?!
