RUN, gorgeous!

Ostrich Dinner: Ostriches are noble, elegant creatures with beautiful clear eyes, slender necks, and gorgeous long stems. If it were socially acceptable, we might live freely among them in inter-species bliss. But instead of falling in love at the sight of these wondrous animals, some people just see dinner. The wild ostrich population has declined drastically in the last 200 years, so when we received word that West Village bistro Paris Commune would be serving a four course Ostrich dinner on March 2nd, we were inclined to, yes, hide our heads in the sand. But at least the restaurant is sourcing their ostrich locally, and the purveyor will be on hand to talk about what you're eating, you heartless glutton.

We're told the ostriches are being provided by New Jersey's Roaming Acres Farms, which also raises emus and sells the meat and eggs at the Union Square Greenmarket. (According to Fork in the Road, ostrich meat is deep red and lean (the birds don't have intramuscular marbling), and tastes beefy.) The menu is priced at $60 per person (plus tax/tip), or $100 for wine pairings.

It begins with an Ostrich and Wild Mushroom ConsommÃ©, Bourbon-Rosemary Foam with a Skewered Ostrich Meat Ball with Green Herb Aioli; followed by a Cool Smoked and Spice Rubbed Ostrich Trio, then an entree of Grilled Ostrich with Kiwi-Habanero and Apricot Chutney, Roasted Baby Carrots, Mushrooms and Turnips Cauliflower Puree. For dessert: Ostrich Egg CrÃ¨me BrulÃ©e with Elderflower, Roasted Pear.

99 Bank Street; call (212) 929-0905 for reservations.

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