Thanks to a growing scandal, Saturday Night Live brought back Fred Armisen's Governor Paterson character is back on Weekend Update. And Armisen-as-Paterson (hereafter referred to as "Paterson") relished the return, "Congratulations, NY Times, you snared the elusive David Paterson. Finding something wrong with my administration is like finding a needle in the needle store. You found out I was a bad governor. Who tipped you off—everyone?"
"Paterson" also said, "Remember how bad a governor I am already? Imagine how awful I'll be when I'm not trying to impress anyone." He said apparent Democratic gubernatorial nominee Andrew Cuomo "can take" Albany and that Cuomo will be "eaten alive by those upstate goblins. They're going to tear that guy apart and use his blood for their cave paintings. Andrew, if you're in Albany, I can recommend a great place to go to dinner. It's called Manhattan. And if you need a good restroom, just use... New Jersey!"
"Paterson" also revealed his plans for after his term—sounds like he'll be applying for this job. In 2008 Saturday Night Live introduced "Paterson" with him proclaiming, "I'm a blind man who loves cocaine who was suddenly appointed governor of New York. My life is an actual plot from a Richard Pryor movie." But the real Paterson was annoyed.
