Seems you can't have a perfectly innocent "fire massage" party in your Tribeca condo loft without the neighbors getting all bent out of shape about it. What's fire massage, you say? Well, judging by this surreal video taken at one of sex toy salesman Dimitri Dimoulakis's ragers, it's when a woman waves a wand of fire over the bare back and legs of a man, who is lying down on what looks like a kitchen counter. According to a lawsuit filed by the condo board, "The man's pants are also pulled down to his ankles." Well, yeah—does it seem like a good idea to leave your clothes on when you're getting massaged by a torch? Then again, torch massage doesn't sound like such a good idea either, but that's what these people are into, among other things.
Neighbors were outraged to find that there was also a stripper pole in the 1,800-square foot basement apartment, and Dimoulakis, who was subletting the place from one James McGown, would charge $10-$15 a head for admission to the bacchanals. The condo board claims the events often featured "pornographic elements, and [caused] horrendous noise disturbance, dangerous conditions and severe risk for the condominium." They complained about the noise, but Dimoulakis and McGown "continued their brutal course of conduct," and after a December 5th bash, "garbage and debris were left strewn about the building entrance, with a trail of blood from the sidewalk leading up to the basement side entrance." (Inside, one imagines a smoldering crater in the bed and a pistol in the toilet.)
Perhaps this whole thing could have been smoothed over if these two hosts had just been more gracious and invited their neighbors to their fun sex toy fire massage stripper pole Burning Man-type parties. After watching the crazy video below, we can only assume the condo scolds were just jealous:
