Move over Hipster Grifter, the Observer has their eye on Houseguest from Hell! At the center of the sad tale is New Yorker Matt Tratner, who visited London earlier this month and left his Fresh Meadows, Queens apartment (and his dog) in the care of a friend named John. A longtime pal of Tratner's, John's yoga wear line (sold at Barney's) recently went under and he was attempting to pick up the pieces of his life. Once alone, however, everything fell apart, he displayed odd behavior to those who encountered him, and soon enough the SWAT team was called into the building. They found him "standing in front of Matt’s kitchen window...butt naked and full of blood." Tratner promptly returned, to find his home in disarray—the living room sofa was in the bathtub, the apartment was flooded, everything shattered, and blood smeared just about everywhere. A hazmat team cleaned up most of the blood, but Tratner is left with upwards of $15,000 worth of damages. Yikes. With his friend now in a city-run psychiatric hospital, Tratner says he will not be pressing charges.