Oh brother, this Valentine's thing is just not going to go away, at least not until Sunday. If you're single, mazel tov! But if you're a Gentleman in a Relationship with a Lady and you haven't yet made plans, it's about time to man up. Now, maybe you've got one of those "laid back" special ladies who's all down on the man and swears she doesn't want you to throw money away just because of some corporate bourgeois scam. Obviously this does not mean you're off the hook; it means there had better be something special in the works, just not a harried, overpriced prix-fixe in some crowded restaurant.
To that end, here are some less typical solutions to your V-Date problems. (And here is our sprawling restaurant roundup, as well as some useful V-Dating advice from the Foggy Monocle.)
Horseback Riding on the Beach: Give you and your lover an indispensable slow-motion clip for your relationship montage by booking a horseback riding expedition in Jamaica Bay. It's not so crazy really; the high Saturday is supposed to be in the 40s. The private trail/beach ride costs $53 per person, lasts 45 minutes, and, according to the person we spoke with, entitles you to giddy-up as fast as you want. Operated by the family-owned Jamaica Bay Riding Academy, the trails are a short taxi ride from the B, Q, and L train stations. [Via wRECK Sports.]
Love the Bike Lanes: Time's Up! has organized a "Love Your Lane" group bike ride Saturday, which culminates with an after-party at the mysterious "Autumn Bowl" in Greenpoint, and a dance party in the bowl! Their website encourages you to "celebrate Valentine's Day with your true love—your bicycle...Join the Party on Wheels as we listen to corny love ballads from the soundbike, throw roses at all the cars parked outside of the bike lanes and spread the message of love to all the drivers we pass stuck in traffic. Road rage is OUT, bike-lane-loving is IN." The ride begins at 7 p.m. at Astor Place Cube; the $10 party benefits Times Up! and features DJs, a live set by Team Robespierre, and free valet bike parking.
Housing Works: The party at this renowned bookstore/cafe dedicated to ending AIDS and homelessness sounds intriguing. It's called the "Valentine’s Day Personal Media Mixer and Confessional Culture Variety Show," and features music by Michael Hearst of brainy indie rock band One Ring Zero. Performances and "activities" are promised from Post Secret (the group art project where people anonymously mail in postcards revealing their darkest secrets), Cassette From My Ex (the project where people share old mix tapes), Found Magazine, and several other eccentrics. Your $15 ticket comes with a copy of a book from one of these people; a $50 ticket gets you two free drinks and three books.
Monkey Town: Don't call it a prix-fixe, call it "Feast and Film." Williamsburg's funkiest performance, film and food venue is serving a five-course dinner while projecting four different Vampire films simultaneously on four giant screens, with "DJ Valentina" mixing songs of love, lust, and blood with the dialogue from the films. There are two menus to choose from—non-chocolate and all-chocolate—and the films are F.W. Marnau's 1922 silent film Nosferatu, Claire Denis's Trouble Every Day starring Vincent Gallo and Beatrice Dalle (Betty Blue), the "campy boob-fest" Vampire Lesbos "featuring incredibly fake blood and lots of sexedelic delights," and Werner Herzog's Nosferatu, starring Klaus Kinski. (Monkey Town notes that "besides about 15 ridiculously grotesque minutes in Trouble Every Day, this is not very graphically violent stuff.")
Milk & Cookies: You can bank on a big "awwww" from your special lady friend when she realizes you're taking her to Milk & Cookies so the two of you can bake your own special Valentine's Day cookies together. Sure, you could do that at home, but then you'd have to clean up. Here they give you a complimentary beverage, the dough, and all the fixings you need to personalize your cookies. When they come out of the oven, you can either take them home or eat them right there while they're still warm. $25 per couple.
