If 2014 was the year of Manspreading, let 2015 be the year we call out and conquer Sidewalkspreading. You may also call this: sidewalk blocking, pavement plugging, block blocking, being an inconsiderate human, etc. The sidewalks are about to get smaller with all this snow accumulating, so this is a timely and important PSA! Read on...
Sidewalkspreading is when two or more people (and no, not just tourists) are walking on a sidewalk and refuse to collapse their moving blockade when confronted by oncoming pedestrian traffic. This means "you" need to jump into the bike lane or street or snow bank, depending on how heavy traffic, or just keep going, forcing them to move because there is no alternative.
Sidewalk chicken caught on film. (Photo via mattron's flickr)
Often if you are forced into this game of sidewalk chicken there will be some passive-aggressive shoulder bumping as you pass by each other. It will make you wonder what this city is doing to us that we're so capable, eager even, to nudge into another human being in an effort to show them there are consequences to being inconsiderate. And those consequences are coming into direct physical contact with another inconsiderate person. Yeah, you showed them.
Anyway, we're all not our best human selves at times, but the people who don't make room on the sidewalk rank among those who make you question if anyone has any common decency left. Maybe they make you feel invisible, or like you don't matter. (But you do, fellow pedestrian. Take back the sidewalk!) Most importantly, these sidewalk bullies make you surpass your annual sigh quota. You do not want to surpass your annual sigh quota—the Koch brothers are fueled by the psychic pain garnered from our sighs.
So, here are the rules when it comes to walking on the sidewalk in NYC (can you believe we even need to go here?): If it's a wide sidewalk, collapse your group of 4 into 2, if it's a narrow sidewalk, collapse your group of 2 into 1. You won't be able to see it, but if you abide by these simple rules, each person you make room for will have an extra hop in their step after they pass by you, they may even do a little happy tap.
Some other rules for walking can be found here. Meanwhile, in South Williamsburg...
