There is a wrong way to hang your dry cleaning from the handrail on the subway; there is a creepy, occult induction way, and THEN there is the right way, which we observe altogether too infrequently.
Here are the steps to properly hanging your dry cleaning on the the subway. (This happens to be the D train, but the same rules apply to the B,F,M, L, 7, 4 and S):
1) Pick up dry cleaning, or, to save money, simply place plastic sleeves over your already-hung clothes.
2) Enter the subway/dragon.
3) Place hung dry cleaning on handrail
4) Slide between items as you would crawl back into the womb. (Face-first, eyes squeezed shut, wearing a swim cap/fashion tiara.)
5) Once inside your dry cleaning cocoon*, you will find yourself unable to see from within the amniotic sac of dress slacks. Take solace in this rare quietude.
6) Use your commute to determine how much the air rights to the space above your seat is worth.
*This is probably an optical illusion, but if we've learned anything this past week is that sometimes, it's OK to keep the mystery alive.
