Someone (Hallmark channel? Oprah? Monsanto? The Koch Brothers?) has placed roses on the seats inside some subway cars, allegedly because it's a nice thing to do around Valentine's Day. But there's also the chance that this person/corporation is just trying to impale straphangers with thorns. Or worse: promote something. Or even worse: go viral. As Ween once said, and Phish once repeated, "Don't believe the professionally shot video when it tells you that the roses are free."